from the blog

The Compliments Folder

I love giving compliments. I’ve made a conscious effort to notice good things about people around me and point them out ever since I was in college.  But I’m not as good at letting compliments in, for some reason.  I greatly appreciate receiving a compliment, but for some reason, it’s hard for me to hold on to them.  Recently, I decided to do something about this problem.

I now know about myself that I have trouble remembering things I haven’t written down.  So I am kind of a fanatical notetaker.  I bring a notebook just about everywhere I go.  I take notes, and then I review them later.  It has helped me so much to hold onto the things I want to remember from meetings, conversations, classes, etc.  

A few weeks ago it occurred to me that I could do the same with compliments.  So, lately, when I’ve received a compliment, I’ve written it down.  And then I’ve made a folder in my phone where I can store these compliments (I take a picture of it and then store the compliment in a folder I called, aptly, Compliments, in my phone).

So, now I am holding onto these compliments AND I have them with me all the time when I want to be reminded of them.  And it’s making a real difference.  Being able to look at that folder when I’m feeling low or like I could use a boost is really helping.  I don’t have to dig into the dark recesses of my mind and try to conjure some kind words I’ve received in the past; but instead can read them directly as they were given and feel an instant boost from them.

My Compliment Folder has made such a difference to me, I think you could maybe use one too (unless you’re great at retrieving compliments you’ve received from memory exactly when you need to be reminded of them– in which case, rock on!).  What if you started compiling compliments you’ve received in order to lean on them when you need to remember them?  Why don’t you start a Compliments Folder and see what happens?  The results might really surprise you.